I don’t really post much lately not here, not anywhere really, because normally I don’t have a lot really to say to anyone, my own loneliness gets to me sometime, and it’s no one’s fault really but my own. I push so many people away from me all the time that I don’t keep, many friends. I guess in the end it’s this fear of not getting hurt. And I am not one to fear many things, sides from an atomic bomb dropping which has always been an almost unreasonable fear about me, it’s not like I grew up in a war stricken country, I believe I could boil it down to the fact I grew up next to air force bases. Though still I really don’t do much with people. I don’t drink socially, I don’t smoke and I have never been into drugs. Drug are so something I am not into though it’s a personal choice, not from the fact I had DARE shoved down my throat, but I have seen to many people destroy their lives on it, be it Marijuana to Cocaine, it’s just not for me. However times in depression from the lack of social interaction I tend to act like I am strung out on something because I talk to myself. Which in a since is pretty amusing, in any case I am posting here now because I can and because I just want to let the happy people in the world know I am alive.
current mood: Self Thoght current music: Caresse Sur L'Ocean-Kelly Sweet
I don't believe in new years so, anyway thought I'd post something and say hello to everyone and let people know that I am alive, and okay. If anyone wants to find me you know where I am at....
current mood: apathetic current music: Random Music
Well I am posting, I don’t know what for, not many bother reading or replying so I’d just thought I’d reactivate my life just slightly like nudge in away. I am pretty okay with myself, no true drama in my life and considering all things. I am proud of Sean and happy with my life so far. Which makes for the best if you ask me, but your not so it’s okay anyways. Holiday season right now how me more excited then anyone can understand. Happy I have a tree up and all the kitties are ok. All well but one Ash, poor boy have hypervocalization which is driving us slightly crazy. Hypervocalizing (meowing loudly and excessively to the distraction and perhaps sleeplessness of the owner) is not only driving us crazy we’ve gone to wearing earplugs at night. But we’re holding onto hope that he will stop. Don’t get my wrong he’s a beautiful kitty and I love him to death but him driving me insane isn’t helping. Other then that the other world around me is ok. Koko and Peepers are as awesome as any other kitties can get.
current mood: I'm okay nothing much to say! current music: Random Music
There are times I read the news and just want to scream after reading it. The world is so scary now growing up in it, I fear for every person that stands and walks in a place in time where there is so much possibility, yet so much fear. Everyone is scared of something that they have no control over. I am sick of listening about Britney Spears. The sad thing is I can say this name that would have no real relevance on someone if she weren't famous. All I have to say is Marie Antoinette, if you understand what I mean by that then you know your history. Someone will have to suffer to draw us away from our suffering. I am tired of listening to the increased problem with money, prices are rising on basic necessities, a jug of milk nearly four dollars a gallon, gas three. Not that we necessarily need gas but milk. Everyone wants to talk about wars and problems of war, when genocide is occurring in places all over the world. Aids, Cancer, Asthma, Diabetes diseases, viruses, nothing anyone has any true control of. Nothing is safe, is the wake up call, from animal food, toothpaste, toys. Everything in danger, tuna, trees, the air, the ocean, the planet and everyone is either to scare, lazy, or tired to change or do anything about it. I got to thinking yesterday while eating, that the upper crust of middle class is soon to be the low rung and where does that leave me. Where does that leave most of the people I know. I don't know or understand, and I am damn sure I am not talking about anything new or anything that anyone else has thought of. But the world scares me and if your not scared your either having everything handed to you on a silver platter or your not taking a good hard look at the world around you. All I can do is sit here and wonder where I am going to wake up tomorrow, if you understand what is being said in this statement then pass it along.
current mood: depressed current music: Across The Universe
For all you movie lovers lets head out with some up dates. Ok for those of you that like the Dragonlance: Dragons of Autumn Twilight is going to be coming out this summer closer to the fall, it’s an animation and it has some pretty interesting voice actors. Michael Rosenbaum, who played Lex Luther in Smallville, he’s going to be the voice to Tanthalas 'Tanis', Lucy Lawless is going to be Goldmoon, now if you don’t know who Lucy Lawless is all I have to say is Xena and you need to crawl out of your cave. Jason Marsden he’s played so many voice-overs it’s not funny but he’ll be Tasslehoff Burrfoot, and someone I don’t know is playing Caramon Majere but who is playing Raistlin Majere, well Kiefer Sutherland, yes that dude that is on 24 and was the lead Vampire in Lost Boys. Speaking of Lost Boys a sequel is coming out; it will be strait DVD release and it will suck. It is however being made by Warner studios but get this it’s going to be a plot about Vampire Surfers. The hot rumors are Constantine 2. Keanu Reeves will be back, but the previous director, Francis Lawrence, will not be directing, only producing. Frank Miller himself has a desire to work on creating a “sequel" to 300. The Watchmen comic book adaptation is confirmed as happening and being made by Zack Snyder. And those of you that think Jet Li is out of the movie making business, well he just put forward to everyone that he is in fact he is in an upcoming movie with Jackie Chan. Well that’s all from me today J Yes I know I am a tard for even wanting to keep up with Hollywood.
current mood: Chillen current music: Theme from Harrys Game, Clannad
Given the fact that it snowed, sleeted and hailed. I think over all it was an asstastic past few days. Only to prove to the world that yes Texas can have some cold fucking winters. However all is fine in the world but it's really put me in the frame of mind to go back to school and head into meteorology yes I know it will be very math insensitive and that I suck at math, but I think one passion of mine is science and not many people can say they want to go to school to learn how to look and see the weather. In any case I for one would think it a great thing to endeavor to go into
I got to thinking, something that is deep and intense to me, that is not understood to most people, and that is my relationship with my love; my Sean! Someone, I don't offend mention in my life, as to so much give credit to, and I don't think I can get anymore open then this, in a post to so many witnesses that I love him. See what birthed this sudden burst was something I read. It was so profound in it's simplicity that I thought of posting it. Infantile love follows the principle: "I love because I am loved." Mature love follows the principle: "I am loved because I love." Immature love says: "I love you because I need you." Mature love says: "I need you because I love you."
Make what you want from it and see what you get out of it.
For you alone people. Don't let this depress you. Please.....
current mood: loved current music: Toccata and Fugue in D minor
Self Thoght
apathetic
I'm okay nothing much to say!
depressed
Chillen
Hop hop hop
Peace love and go fuck off
Happy Kitty
drinking Life
Ice
I wanna flower
blah
loved